Whoop Blog

 

 

People say the German’s don’t like jokes. German’s think that’s not funny. I spent 10 months performing in Germany in a fancy variety theater. As part of my “on stage antics” I would lure a German man onto the stage using a big beer as bait. It worked amazingly well, like convincing an arsonist to borrow your lighter. I did this every night (twice on Saturday and Sunday) for almost a year.

 


One night I was chastised by the stage manager for waiting too long to give the audience member his beer. Apparently the “head” of the beer, the white foamy part, had gone down too low and serving the man a beer in this way was disrespectful. I had insulted not only him, but the theater, the people who hired me, the audience, the beer brewer, the company that made the glass and my own parents for ruining their reputation as “Kinder Rearers”. German’s love their beer.
So many stereotypes about people are just plain wrong and are often the result of ignorance and fear but in a country like Germany where there are national laws in place to protect the purity of beer…well the stereotype is startling true. I watched Germans consume so much beer it was unbelievable. It was amazing that a country could accomplish so much while being completed hammered.


“Trink! Trink! Trink!” the audience would chant as my volunteer chugged his beer after he returned to his seat.
But, unbeknownst to him or anyone but me and the bartender, I had given him, and every other volunteer I’d ever used in the show, an alcohol free beer! A personal little practical joke and it only cost me two beers a night: one alcohol free beer for the audience member and one regular Besteschung Bier for the bartender. Besteschung is of course the German word for “bribe” and it was worth every pfennig.